Deceitful Trickery of Mental Illness
The mind lies.

Within a downward spiral,
my brain lies to me.
Mental distortions such as…
…I have no friends.
……I’m not the parent my child deserves.
………If I disappeared, life would go on just fine without me.
…………What I do doesn’t make a difference in this world.
So, what’s the point?
These feelings,
although real,
come from thoughts that are lies.
I’ve learned they are lies,
Yet I can’t accept it when reality is lost.
During these times,
I cannot trust myself to make good decisions
…because I know my mind is irrational.
This is the deceitful trickery of mental illness.
My mind is feeding me lies,
Yet still, I feel their truth…
…in my heart,
……in my gut.
It’s agonizing.
I want to hide
…or flee.
Sometimes, I just freeze
for the sake I may later have regrets.
Recurrently, I succumb
…to my thoughts, enveloped in pain
…pain initiating in the heart,
then physically taking over my entire body.
This is mental illness.
Copyright © 2018 Alicia Rust. All rights reserved.