Deceitful Trickery of Mental Illness

The mind lies.

Photo by Valentina Aleksandrovna on Unsplash

Within a downward spiral,

my brain lies to me.

Mental distortions such as…

…I have no friends.

……I’m not the parent my child deserves.

………If I disappeared, life would go on just fine without me.

…………What I do doesn’t make a difference in this world.

So, what’s the point?

These feelings,

although real,

come from thoughts that are lies.

I’ve learned they are lies,

Yet I can’t accept it when reality is lost.

During these times,

I cannot trust myself to make good decisions

…because I know my mind is irrational.

This is the deceitful trickery of mental illness.

My mind is feeding me lies,

Yet still, I feel their truth…

…in my heart,

……in my gut.

It’s agonizing.

I want to hide

…or flee.

Sometimes, I just freeze